I need to RAGE.  The raging may be preemptive, but I still must RAGE.  However, this is really just for fans.  Nobody else well truly understand.

For those who don’t know, my favourite series is The Mortal Instruments (technically, I prefer The Infernal Devices but…) and now, the first novel, City of Bones is being made into a movie.  I.  Was.  Thrilled.

And then I began to find information out about he movie.  First, the actors.  Oh.  No.  Nooooo!  Clary Fray/ Fairchild does NOT look like a natural redhead and her eyebrows… they’re not ugly exactly, but they’re just too PROMINENT.  If Clary had crazy eyebrows, we would have been told in the novel.  And the WORST is Jace (no last name; too confusing).  He is supposed to be what?  GORGEOUS.  Undeniably, overwhelmingly sexy, sexy enough that total strangers approach him about his “mango”.  And… he’s… not, really.  I mean, it’s a personal opinion, but I saw a post about the actor titled “Hot or Not.”  There should be no QUESTION about whether Jace is hot.  Bad choice of actor.  Sorry Jamie.  I’m also just not seeing it with Valentine.  However, the rest of the actors seem okay.

And then I saw the trailer…  Oh Hollywood.  Come ON.  This is ALREADY an action packed book with a cool plot line and wicked action scenes.  Why did you have to… overdo it?  I mean, at WHAT point did Clary use a FLAMETHROWER?  At.  What.  POINT?

And they MISSED the other parts of the novel, the parts that endeared it to me.  They’re probably still in the movie, but the fact that they’re not emphasized in the trailer indicates that they’re likely not emphasized enough throughout the film.  I’m talking about the romance(s), the keep-you-on-your-toes-and-emotionally-stretched love stories!  The romantic and sexy (and slightly kinky) relationships! And what about the humour, the unique-and-sudden-laugh-out-loud quips?!  The cute and sarcastic one liners!  It’s these that make the whole book.  Without them, the movie looks really dark, with all those demons and things.  The trailer, based on just the tone, makes it seem like an entirely different movie.


Totally apt fanart.

And the all time, most important thing they missed in the movie?  MAGNUS BANE.  The flamboyant, flaming warlock who oozes sparkles and sass!  He’s the BOMB.  And he didn’t make any appearance at all in the trailer.  None whatsoever.  He’d probably ruin the whole scary-action-floating-girls-in-spooky-white-dresses vibe.  And none of the pictures of him show sparkles!  Come on!  There needs to be a glitter budget of, like, $500 per scene Magnus is in, not to mention the refills for the Bedazzler. 

Anyway… Hollywood, don’t overdo it, okay?  It’s not supposed to be ALL demons and strange runic letters.  Remember the whimsy, remember the sass, remember the love, and most importantly, REMEMBER THE SPARKLES.

Look here for the characters and trailer.   http://themortalinstrumentsmovie.com/